Main Red Flags in Dating a Woman

17.01.2020

Now there are more than 7 billion people in the world. And, it would seem, is it really impossible to find your soulmate among them, to live happily and die in one day?

Not at all. However, look around: not every couple is perfect. People enter into the wrong relationship according to all the laws of the classical story: they swear, endure, rage, take offense, but don't break up for some reason. Unfortunately, many of them build relationships that have no future or do not notice red flags before dating. It is not unfoundedly that these signs are common for so many couples. Sometimes people just do not match and that is normal, you should just listen to your heart and how you feel near someone. If the person near you was just not made to be your specific partner, do not get upset. You should better be thankful that you have noticed this in time and, hopefully, articles like ours can help you in this.

Why You Should Not Ignore Dating Red Flags

What are the red flags in dating? Those are alarming signs that ruin your trust in a person, make you question the choice of the partner in general and tell that you should better end the relationships. Sometimes many habits of our lover seem more than strange, and it is not known how this will affect the relationship in the future. What is really worth paying attention to when starting a new love affair, and what “alarming bells” cannot be ignored when developing a relationship?

For example, when your relatives and friends do not like your chosen one. Your loved ones are more mature people, and they see the situation from the side, so you should consider their experience and listen to the advice of relatives, especially if you have a harmonious family. Moreover, criticism from relatives or friends should always be constructive and motivated, not regarding the appearance of your chosen one but the behavioral aspects.

Someone may notice that your partner is greedy or selfish. And one of the friends may say that your girlfriend rolls her eyes when you are talking, these are all the behavioral characteristics of your partner, which are visible to others and may not be clear for you due to the fact that you are in love and idealize the object of your passion. Please, look soberly on what girls for dating you choose and listen to what people you trust say about them.

How Many Red Flags in Dating Is OK to Ignore?

How often do you face the situation, “This is a particularly alarming sign, I should leave before it is too late”? It turns out that not everything is so simple. And if you love each other, then even the most alarming signals cease to be like that when you continue to trust each other. Of course, we are not talking about cheating in relationships or emotional abuse, but some bad character traits can be always worked on and got rid of.

A serious relationship is a marathon, not a hundred-meter race. For some couples, relationships begin passionately and violently, but over time the “fuse” disappears. Others move “slowly but surely” and stay together even decades later (and sometimes all their lives). It turns out that these couples have something in common. They did not give up seeing the first unpleasant things about their partners, they knew that a few red flags in dating a woman or a man are not the end of the world.

What is more, your union definitely has a chance if you can laugh at yourself and each other, and you find ways to express your love even in little things. It is not about malicious and contemptuous ridicule that serves only to feel one’s superiority over another. Such jokes destroy relationships. It is more about the ability not to take oneself too seriously and the ability to laugh good-naturedly at quirks both yours or your partner's. It can be jokes about, say, your partner’s favorite movie, someone's past mistakes or selfish actions.

Having sex is easy, but it is much harder to show your love every day. There are many ways to show your partner how you love and appreciate them. Every detail plays a role, for example, they do not forget to make you a coffee in the morning, or constantly remind you of how much they appreciate your hard work. If partners constantly care about each other, this is an important sign that the relationship has a great future, and minor dating red flags can be ignored.

First Date Red Flags That Tell You Should Not Go on with Her

The concept of “healthy relationships” is different for each person, and we all build our alliances as we see it. Very often, looking at someone else's family, we think that there is a lot of problems between the partners, and their union is not at all perfect. People get stuck in such relationships, stay together for years, although, they do not enjoy the company of each other and see no future in each other. Would it save the situation if you paid attention to the early red flags in dating? Could they save up a few years of life by parting earlier instead of hoping that their partners would change? Here we have conducted 5 red flags in dating related to your first meeting. If something goes wrong already from the first date, you should better not waste your time.

Being late for no good reason

Girls have long reserved the right to be late for dates, but even they must have good reasons for this. She may have got into a traffic jam, the key was stuck in the lock, urgent matters appeared - these are good reasons. To talk with a girlfriend on the road, change makeup, forget what time is scheduled for a date and so on are the reasons that should make you wonder if your companion is really interested in you and your relationships.

Her actions run contrary to the words

Sometimes girls ascribe completely unusual qualities to themselves. For example, to surprise her gentleman on a first date, she may say that she is an active environmentalist, and in general, ecology bothers her more than anything. Well, this is commendable, but if, at the same time, the girl drinks coffee from a paper cup and uses a straw, there is reason to think. We all know that real eco-friends adhere to special rules, among which, of course, the ban on the use of disposable tableware.

Often looks to the right

Psychologists are sure that if a person looks up and to the right, she turns to the future, in other words, she comes up with an answer, but does not remember. When the interlocutor uses visual memory, this can be indicated by looking to the left or just up. But you should not study the girl's oculomotor reactions all evening, trying to catch her in a lie, otherwise, she will determine the outcome of this meeting faster than you.

Recalling the ex

If your whole evening is devoted to conversations about the ex, you can safely say goodbye to this young lady because, in the future, such conversations will not stop. It doesn't matter in what light your companion speaks of an ex-boyfriend. The very fact that she talks about him on the first date is one of the major dating red flags for guys.

Blames herself for all sins

“It’s my fault ...,” “I should have ...,” “If it weren’t for me ...,” “I had to act differently then.” If you hear such phrases from a girl, it is better to stop communicating with her - take care of your psyche.

As a rule, the fact that a person blames themselves for everything indicates low self-esteem, inability to take responsibility and the mentality of the victim. And this type of person, to put it mildly, is not the most pleasant, and living together with them can create many problems. So, being overly grumpy, complaining and sorry is one of the dating red flags to look for in a woman.

Red Flags in Early Relationships Which Promise No Good

Relationships and emotions are closely interconnected. And it is precisely by the presence, absence or quality of the latter that one can judge how happy the couple is and how long their union will last. Sometimes all the signs of a doomed relationship may be evident, but one of the partners, even feeling out of place, may ignore them or not notice at all. It is for such cases that we have prepared a list of red flags in relationships when dating. You will not be happy in such relationships. It is better to end them.

You are not becoming a better person

This applies both to your internal condition and your plans for a career and professional activity. The person next to you does not allow you to fulfill yourself and do what you love but also constantly undermines your faith in yourself, your mental balance and the ability to enjoy life. You constantly experience a feeling of depression, hate yourself, when once again it was not possible to keep calm, listening to another claim. It seems to you that life is passing by because it is already the 10th month that you plan to go to piano courses or programming courses to connect your life with this, and your loved one does not inspire but tries to find all sorts of arguments why this is a bad idea. In a happy and harmonious couple, people should grow and develop together, in every way guide and help each other. If one or both of you pull each other to the bottom, then this is no longer an alarming bell, but a real howl of sirens that announces that it is time to begin decisive action.

You are no longer proud of your partner

Think about it: when someone asks you about your soulmate, how they are doing, what do you feel at that moment? Do you want to tell with joy and pride about love, about happiness being together, about how glad you are to have such a kind, purposeful and wonderful person next to you? At the beginning of a relationship, we always want to boast of our beloved one in some way, even though happiness loves silence. And all because we feel that we are very lucky to meet the love of our lives, and at the same time, we see almost no flaws. A little later, when the wave of blind love ends, we all, of course, begin to understand that there are no ideal people, and our chosen one is no exception. But the difference between a happy relationship and those that are doomed to failure is that in the first case, lovers are less fixated on the bad and continue to be proud of their choice, and in the second, pride is quickly replaced by disappointment and even squeamishness. In the latter case, red flags dating will not lead to anything good.

There are no special and significant moments between you

You suddenly realize that there is not much difference between when you were free and what is happening now in these relationships. Unless a little more experience than could be in the case of your loneliness, but in general, life in a pair does not bring you anything good. It's wrong when in the relationship "well, everything is fine, nothing special" because love is originally a magical feeling that changes our minds. And it's not even about some big holidays, surprises and super important events. But when a couple has sincere reciprocity, and people enjoy each other's company, then some kind of special jokes that only two of them understand appears, for example, cute and funny nicknames, etc. Even the simplest walk around the house acquires a special atmosphere, and the meaning becomes filled precisely with the very "moments" that lovers remember with warmth for many long years. If you live as neighbors, connected by pragmatic cohabiting, then it's time to honestly put up a white flag and admit that this is the end.

The partner begins to annoy you in difficult periods

If in difficult times (not related to your relationship) you experience more stress from your partner than from the circumstances themselves, this suggests that you have ceased to be allies, on the contrary, consider each other an even greater burden in this difficult time. This is also another one of the red flags for dating. When one of the couple's members has trouble - they were fired from work, made an unpleasant diagnosis, or just an uninvited depression, people try to support each other with all their might, look for ways to solve the problem and, of course, try to cheer up and assure that everything will work out. If you would prefer to be alone in your relationship in such a situation, and you have to literally endure the person next to you or tear anger on them, then this is also a direct sign that something is going wrong.

The future no longer matters to you

You are tired of quarrels and disputes, and even more tired of thinking about whether you've made the right decision when you contacted this person at all. To step away from the situation and relationships becomes the simplest decision, and you often repeat to yourself, “Come what may,” adding up the responsibility for your life and future to higher powers and destiny. But it’s important to understand that time runs without stopping, and while you turn a blind eye to your dissatisfaction with a current partner and your existence with them, precious weeks, months and even years will pass that you can’t get back.

You often fantasize and become interested in other people

Being attracted to someone or celebrating how beautiful and talented someone is normal, even if you are dating another person. But to imagine how good it is to be free or what your relationship with this “someone else” could be, and even more shamelessly to look and meet with third parties – this is one of the red flags for dating a woman or a man. And even more precisely, it means that mentally you have already parted ways with your partner many times and are ready for dramatic changes. If you recall those happy times when peace and harmony reigned in a couple, you will understand that in strong relationships, there is no place for such thoughts because the heart is 100% occupied by a loved one. But since such doubts have already crept into your head, then you no longer expect anything good from the current relationship and try to find peace and joy elsewhere, even if you are not yet fully aware of it.

An "emotional silence" in relationships

It is another kind of indifference that does not concern future life and plans, but the partner themselves. We often hear allegations that love cannot be filled with emotions all our lives. When the stage of love and passion passes, there comes a period of affection, respect, warmth, calm harmony. This is true, it is difficult to argue. But in full relationships, this period is still filled with emotions, just of a different plan. Perhaps they are less bright, enchanting and crazy. At the very beginning, it seems that you can roll mountains for each other. But then emotions should still maintain a light, allow people to not lose interest in each other, empathize and take care. When emotions are no longer in sight, it is easy to determine: you are not interested in each other's life, you do not seek to communicate, and you think twice before saying something kind and sweet because you are neither sure that you really feel it nor that your confession will not be ignored.

Relationships are like a living being, they take time to continue their growth. It is easy to let everything go by itself, especially if you have a husband, children, work, friends – that is, complete stability. So, the familiar routine and indifference arise. And when the relationship comes to a standstill, people start either rushing around, frantically looking for ways to "refresh" them, or end them.

Learn to value what you have. Look back: when was the last time you went on a date, delighted each other, or, in the end, sincerely talked about what worried you, or made joint plans? Sharing time with your loved ones is easy. Yes, you have so many problems at work. Yes, there’s no time to even sleep. But leave these experiences behind the door. At home, you should be with someone who is dear. This is a pleasant job. Appreciate the one nearby, pay attention to them. And if you do not want to - do not waste time, leave.